It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm on this new diet called "I have 10$ till next Friday, I have rice
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
