are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
