You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Weird thing is that's not the first time I've been felt up by a Santa. Happens every year
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
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