don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
