just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Just paid my credit card bill at the bar. This phone makes it so I never have to leave
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize