i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
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