i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
