I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
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