you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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