i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Randomize
