Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
