Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I believe in your delicious
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
