Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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