It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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