this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
did all my christmas shopping this morning at 4am drunk. never went to sleep. i was walking home drunk last night when i passed a target and saw 3 kids having a dance off. had to join. somehow they convinced me to go shoopping with them. i bought 4 disco balls and a lava lamp.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
So apparently I’m into choking now
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
