i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize
