worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
