Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
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