Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
there is glitter all over my balls
Randomize
