does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
