Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her underwear doesnt even match. If youre going to be a face book whore at least have matching shit.
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
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