Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
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