Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Only you could go on vacation to visit family and hook up with a pro NFL player from Tinder
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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