your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
Randomize