no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
