He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I brought my laptop into the bathroom so I can facebook while vomiting. New low?
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He did a backflip because drugs
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