All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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