she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
