fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
We perfected the quiet ass slap during sex so his roommate wouldn't wake up.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
