i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
Randomize
