I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
She kept calling me her DD, which I assumed meant designated driver, so I was confused because I don't even have a car. Found out later it means designated dick. It's what her and her friends use as code for the guy they want to hook up with at the end of the night. I feel so used.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
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