You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Thanks for making breakfast. I usually have cereal and coffee...but i think margaritas and turkey sandwiches could catch on.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
at this point, i'm only going to therapy to get more free condoms
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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