Bisexual people are plain selfish.
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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