just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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