and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Do you ever get high and look at your cat and feel like you know them on an intellectual level?
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Randomize
