**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
