I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
