I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I need to calm my uterus...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
