we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
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