3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
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