**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
