I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
Randomize
