guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Randomize
