his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
Randomize
