around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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