I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Ended up at a lesbian bar and almost got stabbed in the eye with a dart. Weirdest bachelor party ever.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
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