That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
