Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
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