The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Randomize
