yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I threw a dessert topping at a baby tonight so drink up! If you stay sober tonight I will be very disappointed in you.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
