you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
